(1) In May, Mitsubishi Motors of New Zealand, to spark sales of its Triton compact pickup trucks as “hardy, versatile units,” began offering farmers a companion “hardy, versatile” premium with each truck: a goat. (2) In May, Ichiro Saito, a professor of dentistry at Tsurumi University, publicly warned that as many as 30 million Japanese workers overstressed by the economy are suffering from such severe dry mouth that the country might be experiencing epic halitosis.

Least Competent Criminals

Ezedrick Jones, 18, was arrested in Memphis, Tenn., for the attempted robbery of the very same KFC from which he had recently been fired. Though masked, Jones was quickly recognized by his former manager via the mask’s oversized eye holes, and throughout the robbery the manager kept addressing Ezedrick by name.

Send items to weirdnews@earthlink.net.